"Tangled" is what I'm feeling

I'm full of regret
For all things that I've done and said
And I don't know if it'll ever be ok to show
My face 'round here
Sometimes I wonder if I disappear

Would you ever turn your head and look
See if I'm gone
Cause I fear

There is nothing left to say to you
That you wanna hear
That you wanna know
I think I should go
The things I've done are way too shameful

Your just innocent
A helpless victim of a spider's web
And I'm an insect
Goin after anything that I can get

So you better turn your head and run
And don't look back
Cause I fear

There is nothing left to say
To you
That you wanna hear
That you wanna know
I think I should go
The things I've done are way too shameful

Maroon 5

College Homework Sucks

I'm sitting procrastinating still another night. Putting off as much as I can and still manage to be able to go to class with some honor. There is no motivation. The minutes just tick away another night wasted. The pile still stands. 2- four pages research papers, spanish comp. paper, Spanish Test, All the spanish homework, Math test, Math Homework, Physics Homework, Reading for intersections, Labs, and last but not least Reading for Intersections Honors this all in the next week and half. A plus is I don't have to do any of it. However the people paying to put me through all of this would not be too happy if i didn't do it.... guess that means that a few late nights are in store. o well whats sleep anyway.

New American Classic- Taking Back Sunday

"We've got to get better," I said, "It's all in your head."
We could live through these letters or forget it all together
See the months they don't matter it's the days I can't take
When the hours move to minutes and I'm seconds away

Just ask the question come untie the knot
Say you won't care, say you won't care
Retrace the steps as if we forgot
Say you won't care, say you won't care
Try to avoid it but there's not a doubt
And there's one thing I can do nothing about

When all that we need is just a reaction
It's too much to ask for when there's no attraction anymore
If chasing our dreams is just a distraction
I want to remember when I know that I can't go back

Just ask the question come untie the knot
Say you won't care, say you won't care
Retrace the steps as if we forgot
Say you won't care, say you won't care
Try to avoid it but there's not a doubt
And there's one thing I can do nothing about...

RNC

That's right i could have met Ken Mehlman chairman of the Republican National Commitee. I guess thats what i get for being central college republican. i would have even gotten to drive a golf cart and a free lamberti t-shirt. I didnt decide to go tonight however it would have been really cool but i had all day thursday free.

Everything once familiar
now grows faint
The uncertainity rises
Our hearts grow colder, callous
Hopelessness and helplessness consume us
Searching for those minutes and those hours
where we can escape
The world doesn't just disappear
when you close your eyes, does it?

Living in Your Letters

I'm always assuming the worst,
but you're going on none the less
& there's nothing to cusion your heart led fall.
Letters from further away
keep pulling me close to home.
And there's something to cushion my callous sighs.
And I know that you hope for
longer good-byes
embracing for forever
and falling in your eyes.

Pouring over photographs.
I'm living in your letters.
Breathe deeply from this envelope
it smells like you & I can't be
without that scent. It's filling me
with all you mean to me.

Continually failing these trials
but you stand by me nonetheless
& you won't let me sink
though I'm beggin you.
Phone calls from further away
& messages on my machine,
but I don't ever tell you this distance
seems terrible.
There is no need to test my heart,
with useless space.
These roads go on forever
& so do you and I.

So I'll hit the pavement
it's gotta be better than waiting
& pushing you far away
cause I'm scared.
So I'll take my chances
& head on my way up there.
Cause turning to you is like falling in love when you're ten

Dashboard Confessional

EveryBody.

When your day is long.And the night.The night is yours alone.When you're sure you've ha.enough of this life.Well hang on.Don't let yourself go.Cause everybody cries.And everybody hurts.Sometimes.Sometimes everything is wrong.Now it's time to sing along.When your day is night alone.Hold on, hold on.If you feel like letting go.Hold on.If you think you've had too much of this life.Well hang on.Cause everybody hurts.Take comfort in your friends.Everybody hurts.Don't throw your hand.Oh, no.Don't throw your hand.When you feel like you're alone.No, no, no, you're not alone.If you're on your own.In this life.The days and nights are long.When you think you've had too much.Of this life.To hang on

So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts
You are not alone

Dashboard Confessional

Corolla Glory

This is the creation of the corolla in her past glory. She is now headed for Doug's after a night of excitement and destruction that can be found here on Pommer's blog. Chris, Luke and I used about 5 cans of orange paint, 3 red, 2 blue some 2 white and some primer. This is the general lee of Marion county. We added 5, thats right 5 lights and we still have the the two headlights as well. It couldn't look any better or have been a better finishing touch to the largest project in the history of the highschool. We spent some long friday nights working on her. Notice the exhaust on the side, thanks to the combined efforts of Luke, Ryan and I (thank sam for the food). It was a wicked machine. I would have been stunned to see something like this on the road. It was a good thing but all good things come to an end , as the saying goes.

Saturday Night Ride

All I gots to say is Saturday night in Pella, Wal-Mart, and some redneck engineering.

Dorm Life

only in college can you come back to your living area and find like and then on top of that expect it to stay that way for sometime because you don't have to clean it up and there isn't much anyone can do about it.

Recovering

Listening
Thinking
Walking
Seeing
Talking
Its dull
There is an empty hole.
Trust
There is an aching.
Faith
Time passes slowly
Patience
To be whole once again
Forgiveness
To have happiness
Love

Stay focused, don't slip
Keep your head above water
Reember what He said

Where does your heart lie?
Where did it go?
What if it never changes?
What if its not the same?
What did we have?
What did we lose?
Will it return?
Will you return?
Will you fight?
Will we win?
What does it mean
to lose everything?
Am I lost?
Where am I going?
Will I survive?
I have to,
I have no choice
I'm not lost
Theres just so much
I need direction, a focus
I can't do it alone
I'm not alone
It's not about me anymore
There is nothing more I can do
But let go
the pain the sorrow
It will be ok
I must let go
the hope the fears
He won't let me go
He won't let me fall
I will be ok
As long as give it up

Falling

this drowning sorrow is shaking me
more than it ever has before
the road signs reading bitter end
leave me suspect of a crime

the city air chokes me today
more than it ever had before
i’m nervous to feel deserved
by these street signs anymore

are you
going to
be waiting up when i get home
we’ll stay up all night
getting drunk and watching sunsets on our porch

falling for you
falling for you
i fell for you

these empty feelings question me
of who i think i’ve become
mind is ticking life away
asking if you are the one

i’m dying to explain my heart
to you now
there’s so much on my mind it’s tearing me apart

Slipping into Memories

Those Summer Stars

Do you remember the time when you and i were fine...
and we were better then then we'd ever been before
you came back to me after walking out my door
you would call me on the phone before you even got home
without me you said you were all alone...
the cold wind that blows all the things i used to know
how could it play so fast never thought you'd be part of my past
would i trade it all again to get you out of my head?...
and my heart is breaking
would you hear me baby
as the tears are longing
for what it used to be.

Math Master

So its monday and it sucks waking up. But this morning i woke up the faster i ever have on a monday. I realize after i hit the snooze button that i have a math test today. i have to pass it with 100% in order pass the class, no big deal ya know. I didnt remember all weekend that i had this test so needless to stay i didnt study at all. I have an 8 o'clock and and got there early studied for about 20 minutes and then i studies after class for about a half an hour. I was a little nervous. It was an integral skills exam, calculus stuff. I was the first one done, in 12 minutes, and i passed. Thanks to Mr. linn and his massive amount of homework, paid off after all. it's a good monday for once.